Birthdays

Prologue : "VaTishaches Ha'aretz Lifnei Ha'elokim Vatimalei Ha'aretz Chamas" Chazal tell us that the destruction of the world began with the animals who were acting immorally. The state of immorality prevailed within the world and carried itself up the ladder to mankind. Hashem found fault with man who was caught following the creatures of the earth instead of leading them.

Yet, elsewhere, we are taught to look to the animals in order to learn how to act properly. Indeed, the Gemara (Eruvin 100b) discusses how one should move like a horse and show humility like a cat. Many human lessons of conduct are learned from the animals. When is man supposed to act by learning from the animals and when should he know to serve as the leading species of the world -"V'ha'aretz Nasan L'Vnei Adam?

Rav Yitzchok Cohen (Best of Enayim L'Torah) notes that there is no contradiction within Chazal. Man rises above animals because he has intellect. It is a precious gift. It is man's job not to merely "follow" the animals, as the animals follow the carrot man leaves in front of them. Instead, it is up to man to LEARN from the ways of the animals, to incorporate lessons from the world he lives in so that he can properly incorporate lessons from the world he lives in so that he can properly rule it. Hence, when man follows the animals, he is no better, he is worthy of destruction for that matter alone, for he is not keeping to the conditions of existence.

Much ado exists today about relations with our non-Jewish neighbors. As the Am Segula, are we to always be in the lead teaching lessons of morality? Is there ever a time to allow one to apply Chochmas HaGoyim? This week's Chaburah examines one aspect of this issue, entitled:

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Happy Birthday?

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The Torah discusses the birthday of Pharaoh. The Talmud Yirushalmi (Rosh

Hashanna 3:8) quotes Rabbi Yehoshua Ben Levi who held that the concept of a birthday was based upon the customs of Amalek who held that an individual cannot topple from the top of the world on his birthday.

The Korban Haeida (ibid) notes that during the Amaleki war with the Jews, they used soldiers who were celebrating their birthdays so as to show that their powers were strong during the particular birthday, giving support to Avoda Zara. Moshe, by raising his hands in battle, confused the constellations so that the powers of the Mazalos (constellations) should not fall to the Amalekites celebrating their birthdays, rather, the powers should fall onto the Jews.

Thus, we see that a birthday has special significance to the nations of the world ands seems to have significance to their respective Avodah Zara. One celebrating his birthday has power to overpower his enemies. Is there too much of a comparison if a Jew were to celebrate his birthday? Would that be considered "Chukos Ha'akum"?

The Chasam Sofer was very distraught over birthday celebrations and wrote that one should not celebrate them. He held that if one wanted to mark a particular moment in time as a yearly celebration, he should mark the day he had his Bris. Upon that day he entered Briso Shel Avraham which should protect him.

Sefer Chut Hameshulas records a story of the Ktav Sofer who asked not to be bothered on his birthday and was found in his study crying during that day. When asked why he was crying, he replied that the particular day was his birthday and he was crying for all the wasted years.

Based upon these opinions, it would seem unwise to mark one's birthday. On the one side, it could be viewed as a sad day and Avoda Zara in the extreme.

The Ben Ish Chai (Reah, 17) notes that it is a Siman Tov to mark one's birthday and that was precisely the Minhag in his home. The Sefer Tuv Taam V’Daas (Parshat Vayeshev) actually notes that the Avoda Zara pattern of the Yirushalmi is unique to gentiles who believe in it.

How then does one overcome the fears of the Avodah Zara while properly keeping the position that birthdays be marked?

The Sefer Leket Hakemach (131) that one should make a Seudas Mitzva on one's birthday including a Siyum of some sort to change any celebration into one of festivities of Torah. The Tiferes Yisroel (6) notes that each person should come give him a Beracha on his birthday. This seems to have been a Minhag in Yirushalayim too-that people would go bless Rav Shmuel Salant on their respective birthdays---harnessing the power of one's birthday but using it L'tov – for good.

My dear friend, Rav Avraham Willig once noted that there is a remez I once heard about giving blessings on one's birthday. The Possuk (Tehillim 2:7-8) says “Ani HaYom Y'Laditicha; Shaal Mimeni V'Etaina – I gave birth to you today, ask from me and you shall receive”. It seems that the Possuk makes mention of a power given to a person on his birthday to be answered by Hashem. Rav Avraham added that he found numerous teachings from the Lubavitcher Rebbe zt"l about birthdays where he professes the holiness and significance of birthdays. He lists many suggestions about what one should do on that day including making a Shehecheyanu by eating a new fruit.

(Israeli Ashkenazic Chief Rabbi Rav Yona Metzger (Miyam Hahalacha 4:46) notes that birthday candles and the blowing out ceremony is a problem as Ner (Hebrew for candle)in our religion is compared to Nishmas Adam, man’s soul and that therefore there is no Minhag to blow them out.)